*sigh*

Her birthday is less than a month away. So, I bought her a birthday gift today.

Today was the day she told me she was leaving me for good.

Yeah. I can see the irony in that. But for a fat, good-for-nothing bald slob like me, it's par for the course.  Fall for someone, let them break my heart, and watch them walk away with a clear conscience. 

After all the stuff I've put myself through to make sure she had everything she needed...helped her with her computer, helped her with her move, helped her plan her trips (none of which I was invited on)...listened to her cry, even though hearing it tore my heart to shreds...

She got everything she ever wanted from me, and nothing that she didn't. I'm the one who went out of my way to make her happy. I'm the one who would bring her coffee, even though it required an extra 20 minutes drive in the morning. I fixed her computer, her network, her laptop - for a smile. I drove her to and from the garage to get her car fixed - just to spend time with her. I hung out with her and her kids, and ENJOYED IT, just to see her face.

I wore my heart on my sleeve, and was not surprised when she crushed it like the pesky insect it was to her...

The tears fall from my face like so much rain...and I drown my sorrows in the bottle of green faerie...out of sight, out of mind.  She won't call me again, until she needs something else...

And I'll answer again...because I don't have the heart not to.

:(